23 Aug Khalid’s Corner: Would You Rather Be Loved or Feared?

Words of wisdom from community leader, Khalid Elahi

When I was 22 years old, someone asked me if I would rather be loved or be feared.

Foolishly, I said, “Feared.”

That’s when the lesson began. The elder who posed the question (and I say elder because he was much greater than the term O.G.) was named Stanley Alexander. He taught me that when you are feared, the world is against you. They might greet you with a smile, but underneath the mask they are wishing that you could disappear from the planet.

When you are feared, you won’t be able to get a truthful assessment from those around you about your character, thinking or behavior. They will tell you that everything is all good when in fact you are really foul. Why? Because they fear you. 

When you are loved, you are protected by society. Those around you don’t want to see any harm done to you or come your way. When you are truly loved, society will go above and beyond the call of duty to make your day or show you the right way. They will stand up with you no matter what and will never let you down. Why? Because they love you.

When they fear you, they will try to subtract life from you. When they love you, they will add to your life.

“Stan the Man,” as we called him, changed my mind that day. Since the age of 22, I have intentionally focused on loving and being loved.

And I see the results every day.